Monthly Archives: August 2012

Archery and Amazons

So there’s this myth I’ve heard, about how Amazon women supposedly cut off their right breast in order to shoot better, because it got in the way or something.

Upon first hearing this, I dismissed it as millenia-old misogyny, of the “women can’t naturally do things men do.”

Now, I’m not about to say I’ve stopped dismissing it as misogyny. It still is. But my view became more nuanced once I became an archer myself.

For lack of a better way to describe why, I drew out a, um, diagram of a particular issue faced by me and other female archers;

Bow string drawn across chest + jutting boobs = nipple bruise a la bowstring

So really, wrong boob. Unless all Amazons were left handed.

I really want to draw what a nipplebruise looks like when kindly donated by a bowstring, but I’m nicer than that and I’m not sure that wordpress would be keen on me doing that.  Just picture a breast, and superimpose a 4-inch-by-2-inch bruise that really looks less ‘bruise’ and more ‘purple skin and fucked up red splotches that make it look like you’re bleeding under the skin’.

Fun!

You know, they make guards for your arm for this kind of thing. They make special gloves for your fingers so that you don’t hurt them holding the string. I’ve even heard of people with face guards because they can’t stop slapping themselves when releasing the string.

But should you be so lucky as to find a guard for the chest, it’ll be made (primarily) for men. To, um, hold back clothing. And they’re flat. Which really works well on something curved. Like boobs.

FUN FACT: I hit myself in the boob almost every shot I took while practicing yesterday. This is a few dozen times. It’s like having someone poking a bruise repeatedly, except actually they punch it with all of the force and hatred inside of them.

BEHOLD, THE CUTERUS.

Little crocheted uterus, plus the most adorable kitty face.

With equally cute things;

Cuterus with My Little Pony friends.

Note the sparkles. Not the Twilight Sparkles, the glittery type.

This is where it has lived since I made it. It’s nice having a cat-faced uterus stare you down while you’re on the computer, really.

I was going to send it to a male representative in order to sway him to not be an idiot,  But sweet evil Jesus it’s too cute.

And so it is all mine.

Not all issues are academic.

You can debate science. Or politics. Or religion.

You can disagree with someone about, say, the best economic plan. You could agree to disagree about the role of government. You can decide that someone is entitled to their opinion over the harm of creationism in schools.

But that’s not true of everything.

Like people’s lives.

And this (fantastic) video illustrates pretty damn well why.

As seems to be common among LGBT folks, I would rather have somebody run up and shout “FUCK YOU, QUEERMO” than politely insist that “the fact that gays are lesser humans who don’t deserve rights is just my opinion, and I’m entitled to it.”

Not just because of how much more acceptable it is to punch the first dude.

The first one is just stupid, hateful bile. The second is someone who actually thinks that deciding whether or not the person they’re talking to is an equal human being to them is nothing more than an academic exercise.

There’s a bit more insult there.